I confess I watched 'This Morning' this morning, however, it did lead me on to quite an amusing website
http://www.the-apologist.co.uk/apologies/index.php
Its a place where you can apologise for anything and everything and some of them are damn funny, here's an example.
'During the late seventies I worked for a fruit & veg supply company. One day I was given a special order to make up. It was for a dinner that evening and Margaret Thatcher, then PM, was guest of honour.
Part of the order was a box of button mushrooms. I picked up a mushroom, rolled up a ball of snot, slid it up the mushroom's stem and under the cap. I did another, then another, then another. I just couldn't stop myself. By the time the order was despatched I'd done more than half the box. So, Baroness Thatcher, I'm sorry you ate my bogies.'
:thumbs
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