Ok so I woke up this morning at 5am on the sofa completely naked apart from a towel on my face and I'd pissed the sofa! Went out for my brother in laws stag drinks yesterday & drunk shed loads of cider. I actually can't remember anything past about 9oclock. Apparently I insisted on going topless for most of the evening, got refused entry to hooters & a load of bars because of my drunkeness. Apparently I then proceeded to try to shag a statue of a gorilla in Bristol city centre with my cock out and everything, I also tried talking my father in law into going to a parlour with me & getting a "massage" as if that wasn't bad enough it turns out that I fell over & smacked my head on a metal bench cutting the bridge of my nose and just above my right eye which will be great for the wedding photos on Saturday! The morale of this story is don't drink rough cider two days before a wedding especially a drink called old bristolian which is 8.5%suppose I should of realised there was going to be trouble when the bar staff told me they'd only sell that cider in half pints.
Social Networking Bookmarks