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  1. #1
    DF VIP Member DJ OD's Avatar
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    Default 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    Labour politician admits an affair... with an ALIEN! Father-of-three talks of his belief in extra-terrestial life and claims he fathered a love child with one

    • Whitby councillor Simon Parkes says the child is called Zarka
    • 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year


    Politicians often make claims that seem out-of-this-world.
    But now a councillor in Whitby, North Yorkshire, has made one that really is - Labour's Simon Parkes says he fathered a child with an alien.
    The married father-of-three, who represents Stakesby, said his wife had rowed with him after revealing he had a child called Zarka with an alien he refers to as the Cat Queen.
    The 53-year-old driving instructor said he has sexual relations with the alien about four times a year.




    Whitby Town councillor Simon Parkes, who believes he has had 'hundreds' of encounters with aliens throughout his life and (left) a drawing he made of his alien mother


    'What will happen is that we will hold hands and I will say "I'm ready" and then the technology I don't understand will take us up to a craft orbiting the earth,' he explained.
    'My wife found out about it and was very unhappy, clearly. That caused a few problems, but it is not on a human level, so I don't see it as wrong.'
    Cllr Parkes, who also claims his 'real mother' is a 9ft green alien with eight fingers, said people only claim he is mad because they have not shared his experiences and that the encounters don't affect his work on behalf of Whitby residents.



    'I can understand how you would say that because you have not seen anything yourself and that's your immediate fall-back position, but you come and spend some time with me and follow me around for a day and you will actually walk away shaking your head because you will think actually he's not mad.
    'There are plenty of people in my position who don't chose to come out and say it because they are terrified it will destroy their careers.'
    He told Channel 4 documentary Confessions Of An Alien Abductee his first recollection is of being lifted out of his cot by an alien.

    Married Labour councillor Simon Parkes, 53, who represents Stakesby on Whitby Town Council, has defended his beliefs in extra terrestrial life, after he made outlandish claims on national television that he has fathered a child with an alien

    Councillor Parkes, who spends hours drawing his extra-terrestrial experiences as it helps him to comes to terms with them, said: 'The only thing I can remember after that is it saying to me you will never be hurt, your will never be harmed.

    'I think I am fairly clear in my head that I am being monitored [by aliens] very closely and if there is anything that's seriously about to happen or does happen then I am fairly confident in my own mind that they will intervene, they have in the past.'
    He said he is also often followed by the security services and that he and a female passenger in his car were recently abducted by aliens in Cloughton, near Scarborough, before being returned to the vehicle as it moved.'

    Source

    I didn't see this program on Channel 4, but it sounds like I missed a classic...


    DJ OD

  2. #2
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    Mystical_2K's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    well he sounds loopy
    You know he grew up as a little shitspark from the old shitflint and then he turned into a shitbonfire and driven by the winds of his monumental ignorance he turned into a raging shitfirestorm. If I get to be married to Barb I'll have total control of Sunnyvale and then I can unleash the shitnami tidal wave that will engulf Ricky and extinguish his shitflames forever. And with any luck he'll drown in the undershit of that wave. Shitwaves.

  3. #3
    DF VIP Member BertRoot's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    Should do some art lessons so he can represent his dreams better...


  4. #4
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    I don't know what he's on but I want some

    Cheapreefer on instagram

  5. #5
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    beerman's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    I watched the program and was in stiches. One woman was saying the aliens were playing tricks on her moving things around the house. She said about a time she put her cigerettes in the kitchen and then couldn't find them, they magically appeared in the living room. This woman instantly believed the aliens had done it rather than her having a few cans and forgetting she'd moved them to the living room.

    edit, anyone who wants a laugh:


  6. #6
    DF VIP Member greasemonkey's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    Quote Originally Posted by Mystical_2K View Post
    well he sounds loopy
    I wouldn't say loopy i think they just genuinely believe their own mind that its aliens when its more than likely sleep paralysis etc, but out of these hundreds of people that claim to be abducted every couple of weeks why cant one of them set up some cctv in bedroom and around the house for some definitive proof of what it is or what its not

  7. #7
    DF VIP Member neilb's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    So glad I just took the time to watch that, some of the best lines ever.

    I get abducted a lot when we're not eating Kentucky like, but it seems to happen a lot when we're eating Kentucky

  8. #8
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    Haven't had chance to view it yet but my mate reckons this was just another collection of people with mental problems rolled out for us to point at laugh? I'll likely give it a wide berth if so, I can't stand 'TV' like that.

  9. #9
    DF VIP Member stevo25's Avatar
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    Default Re: 53-year-old said he has sex with an alien about four times a year

    It was really funny especially the old girl with mad hair

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