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Thread: Iritated anus

  1. #1
    DF VIP Member DJ OD's Avatar
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    Shit Iritated anus

    I've been having a minor, yet a tad annoying issue for the past few months. And in true spirit rather than seek advice from a caring friend or family member, let alone a doctor, I decided to pick the brains of the DF family...

    Before we start, I'd just like to clarify that I don't put things up my arse, nor to I have homosexual tendancies, repressed or otherwise.

    Hard to pin point exactly when this began, but needless to say google searches are of little help. Basically my bumhole itches.

    I've mentioned this in the past to a trusted few, (Thanks BB and Gunny) and the opinion is I have a dirty asshole. While this could well be the case, I can't help but feel there must be some underlying reason more likly.

    I'm pretty sure I wipe my ass suitably well, despite not having any training, seeing any videos on youtube, attending courses or support groups. I usually take three sheets folded in half (45 degrees into a triangle shape), to wipe of the main debris, then a second set of three folded in half to polish off and ensure there is nothing left.

    Shortly after a "drop off at the pool" my sheriff's badge will start to itch. The only way to tame an itch is to scratch it... Being where and what it is, pulling down your undercrackers and poking at your arse with a finger is not always acceptable in public. So a poke in the general direction when no one is looking is the chosen method. This however has addtional problems usually only fully appreciated later on at home. Dirty pants. Pants with finger sized brown circles on where you have been poking your arse...

    On occasion when having a bath I have tried a bit of a "mini colonic". Poking and cleaning my arse thoroughly. While feeling a little odd at the time, and being thankful no-one but the dead can see my antics, this does solve any itching. So it does seem an unclean anus is the problem.

    My questions to you are, what are the best methods of arse wiping, and what other ways are there to avoid poking your own arse in public.

    Anyone else have experience of this? Im not sure but it may go back to when I started shaving my cock and balls. The first few times I got a bit over-enthusiastic and shaved under my nuts towards by bum hole. No issues until it started to grow back in that litttle nether region, and was itchy as hell. Needless to say a few pairs of pants have been discarded.


    DJ OD

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  2. #2
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    im sorry but that made me fucking spit my tea out laughing.

    made my day.

    sorry for your troubles. lol, but I would go and see a Doc

  3. #3
    DF Probation H4ss4n's Avatar
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    I'd see a Dr ASAP:

    The cause of itchy bottom isn't always known. However, it can sometimes be a symptom of another problem or underlying condition.
    Infection

    An itchy bottom may be a sign your body is trying to deal with an infection. The infection may be:

    • bacterial such as the streptococcal bacteria that causes streptococcal infections, or the staphylococcal bacteria that causes staphylococcal infections
    • fungal such as the Candida albicans fungus that causes vaginal thrush (itching, irritation and swelling of the vagina and surrounding area)
    • parasitic such as threadworms (small worm parasites that infect the intestines), or scabies (tiny mites that burrow into the skin)
    • viral such as the herpes simplex virus that causes cold sores

    An itchy bottom can sometimes be a symptom of a sexually transmitted infection (STI).
    If you've had unprotected sex and you think there may be a chance you have an STI, you should visit your local sexual health clinic for advice, testing and, if necessary, treatment.
    Gastrointestinal conditions

    Gastrointestinal conditions affect your digestive tract (your mouth, throat, stomach, intestines and anus).
    Gastrointestinal conditions that may cause an itchy bottom include:

    • piles (haemorrhoids) swellings in and around your anus that contain enlarged and swollen blood vessels
    • anal fistula where a small channel (tract) develops between your anal canal (the last section of the large intestine) and the surface of your skin, near the anus
    • anal fissure a tear or ulcer (open sore) that develops in the lining of the anal canal
    • sphincter incompetence where the sphincter (the ring of muscle that opens and closes your anus) stops working properly, causing bowel incontinence (leaking stools)
    • long-term diarrhoea passing loose, watery stools
    • long-term constipation an inability to completely empty your bowels

    Anal and bowel cancer

    In rare cases, itchy bottom can be a symptom of a gastrointestinal cancer, such as anal cancer or bowel cancer.
    Most cases of itchy bottom aren't caused by cancer, but it's important that your GP rules out all possibilities.
    Anal cancer is rare, with just under 1,200 cases diagnosed in the UK each year. Rectal bleeding, pain, itching and small lumps that develop around the anus are possible symptoms of anal cancer.
    Bowel cancer is the fourth most common type of cancer in the UK, with around 41,500 new diagnoses each year. More than 8 out of 10 cases occur in people aged 60 or over.
    Typical symptoms of bowel cancer include bleeding from the back passage, blood in your stools, or a change in your normal bowel habits, such as diarrhoea that lasts longer than four to six weeks.
    Skin conditions

    Some skin (dermatological) conditions can affect any area of skin on your body, including the skin around your anus.
    Skin conditions that can be associated with itchy bottom include:

    • psoriasis where red, flaky, crusty patches of skin develop because your skin cells reproduce too quickly
    • contact dermatitis where your skin reacts to certain substances (allergens), causing it to become inflamed
    • lichen sclerosus a long-term skin disorder that causes itchy or sore white spots to develop on the skin around the genitals
    • atopic eczema where your skin becomes dry, red and flaky

    Other conditions

    Systemic conditions affect your whole body and can sometimes make your bottom feel itchy. Systemic conditions include:


    Medication

    Some types of medication, including those applied directly to your skin (topical), may make your bottom feel itchy.
    For example, if you use a cream to treat haemorrhoids, it may irritate the sensitive skin around your anus and make the itching worse.
    Some topical medicines may also cause contact dermatitis (red, itchy skin) if used for long periods.
    Medicines that may cause itchy bottom or make your symptoms worse include:

    • peppermint oil which is sometimes used to help relieve stomach cramps
    • long-term use of local anaesthetics medicines that numb a specific part of your body
    • glyceryl trinitrate which is often prescribed as a topical cream to treat anal fissures, and may cause itching
    • long-term topical corticosteroids use medicines applied directly to the skin to help reduce inflammation

    If a medicine you're taking is causing an itchy bottom, your bottom should itch less after you've completed the course of medication.
    Never stop taking a prescribed medication unless advised to do so by your GP or other qualified healthcare professional responsible for your care.
    Speak to your GP if you're taking a medicine on a long-term basis and it's causing an itchy bottom. They may be able to prescribe an alternative.
    http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/itchybo...es/Causes.aspx

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    On the serious side try flushable wipes and if the mood takes you, slip a wipe shrouded digit into the rusty bullethole and try not to enjoy it..


    supe
    http://www.speedtest.net/result/2920820230.png

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Aint it just piles? get some Anusol cream

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Def moist wipes, I would have a bidet if it was at all possible, dry paper will ALWAYS leave some faecal matter on your skin. Seriously consider bacterial infections first (because it is long standing), once thats out of the way look for allergic reactions to detergent etc, even toilet papers will have different processing routines.
    It could of course be piles but usually there would be painful episodes and bleeding.
    If at first you don't succeed.....redefine success. . . .


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    DF VIP Member DJ OD's Avatar
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Quote Originally Posted by supraman54 View Post
    On the serious side try flushable wipes and if the mood takes you, slip a wipe shrouded digit into the rusty bullethole and try not to enjoy it..


    supe
    Best, non GP, advice that. It's what I have been doing in a way.

    To be clear, its not my arse (cheeks) the itchy bit is my hole. It's not all the time, and it's not sore, inflamed, scaley, flakey or any of the other skin osmonds.


    DJ OD

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    yeah that's where piles are itchy on the hole, also piles are not always sore especially to start with they get sorer/bloodier the closer they get to the surface so in the early stages if feels like you got a feather butt plug in ;-)

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    use wet wipes (try the non-scented ones as they should cause less irritation) for a week and see how you get on
    stop bathing and try showering for a week, mini-colonic is fine (who doesnt!) but dont do it in the bath water your sitting in
    have a shower and then try cleaning your arse with the shower head after you have picked out any residue!
    if that hasnt improved after a week then you really need to see a doctor as it could be an infection of some kind.

    doctor Mystical over an out!
    You know he grew up as a little shitspark from the old shitflint and then he turned into a shitbonfire and driven by the winds of his monumental ignorance he turned into a raging shitfirestorm. If I get to be married to Barb I'll have total control of Sunnyvale and then I can unleash the shitnami tidal wave that will engulf Ricky and extinguish his shitflames forever. And with any luck he'll drown in the undershit of that wave. Shitwaves.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Thanks to beerman

    Cosmicpore (26th August 2014)  


  11. #11
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Can't you just drag your arsehole along the floor like a dog does?
    No sympathy for the devil; keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride...

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    pop an icecube up there once a day, that will sort it.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Iritated anus



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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Just go and see a your doctor FFS

    Cheapreefer on instagram

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Quote Originally Posted by ss30 View Post
    Just go and see a your doctor FFS
    erm hello!...............he's British (i presume!) so wont be going to the doctors until he starts shitting himself repeatedly in public or until his cock drops off whilst having a piss

    stiff upper lip man!
    You know he grew up as a little shitspark from the old shitflint and then he turned into a shitbonfire and driven by the winds of his monumental ignorance he turned into a raging shitfirestorm. If I get to be married to Barb I'll have total control of Sunnyvale and then I can unleash the shitnami tidal wave that will engulf Ricky and extinguish his shitflames forever. And with any luck he'll drown in the undershit of that wave. Shitwaves.

    2 Thanks given to Mystical_2K

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  16. #16
    DF VIP Member DJ OD's Avatar
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Quote Originally Posted by Mystical_2K View Post
    erm hello!...............he's British (i presume!) so wont be going to the doctors until he starts shitting himself repeatedly in public or until his cock drops off whilst having a piss

    stiff upper lip man!
    Well said. Ahem.


    DJ OD

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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    piles simples
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    I had this exact same thing from time to time and the only thing that cured it was shaving my arsehole, I guess it just got sweaty and irritable

  19. #19
    DF VIP Member DJ OD's Avatar
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    Quote Originally Posted by Fear345 View Post
    I had this exact same thing from time to time and the only thing that cured it was shaving my arsehole, I guess it just got sweaty and irritable
    I was actually thinking of giving that a go.

    I knew DF was the place for this, who needs quacks eh


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  20. #20
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    Default Re: Iritated anus

    The only other possible cause is arse cancer

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