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  1. #1
    DF VIP Member sparkzz's Avatar
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    Advice Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    Hello...

    Long time since I posted, mainly just enjoy lurking and reading posts..

    I have an issue which seems to have started up about a year ago, I call it "My Cloud".. There seems to be a cloud hanging over my head, which isn't always there, but can literally arrive at any given moment (mood related).

    A bit of back ground, I was diagnosed by the doctor 16 years ago with having stress issues causing panic attacks, when I went to him with a sickness feeling. This got a lot worse before it got better, and over the past 5 or 6 years seems to be in control in the sense I can leave the house and take part in activities etc.. without having any issues.

    I seem to have moved on to a separate phase now, my 40th was a year ago, and I am sure its the mid life crisis causing it, but the cloud that hangs over the top of me, is a feeling I get which I really am not enjoying. This feeling is Dark, very dark.. it kicked off with me losing my temper at one of my daughters and it scared the shit out of me, where I removed myself from the house and went for a drive for 3 hours. I am glad to say that level of anger hasn't returned, however "My cloud" does.

    This cloud makes me seriously depressed, tired, mood swings, irritable, lazy....extremely lazy, cant be bothered to finish anything I set out to do... have given up cycling, making videos, going out with mates.. and the worse thing.. I just don't want to be around people at all... last year I had suicidal thoughts, (not that I actually think I could, as I am shit scared of dying)

    I cant imagine why this is happening, I have lovely wife, who would literally do anything for me, two fantastic daughters, a great job, my dream car, money in the bank, great supportive friends who have been around since day dot, one person who I tried to explain it to just basically said, "you have nothing to be stressed about"... which in some ways, they were right, so why the heck is this happening!! arrrgggghhhhh

    I don't want to go to the doctors as I don't want pills, I don't believe in them.. have been to a therapist years ago, and didn't really feel that worked, admittedly that was before "my cloud" appeared.

    Can anyone relate?.. or from my short story pick up on what I need to be doing?

    Thanks in advance

    Sparkzz

    4 Thanks given to sparkzz

    4me2 (31st August 2018),  Ganty (31st August 2018),  prezzy (31st August 2018),  Rhinoz (1st September 2018)  


  2. #2
    DF VIP Member consoles's Avatar
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    My best advice would be to print this off take it to a doctor who may refer you to someone who can help.

    Thanks to consoles

    sparkzz (31st August 2018)  


  3. #3
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    evilsatan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    I wouldn't say anything is wrong with you, it sounds like what a doctor would label as depression/anxiety which is incredibly common so you're not alone.

    If you really didn't want to seek professional help then you could look into your diet and lifestyle to ensure you have the right balance of vitamins and exercise, it sounds like you were an outgoing person so try to force yourself out on the bike either alone or with some mates and see if that affects your state of mind, maybe join a gym and get into a routine. If you have money in the bank then look at some of your "life dreams", maybe book a holiday or activity that you wouldn't typically choose.

    If you were to visit a doctor you don't necessarily have to be prescribed meds, you can tell them that you'd rather explore options without medication and they may refer you to CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy) which could help depending on the type of person you are. If you were to be prescribed meds then it doesn't have to be a long term solution, you could view them as a safety net or last resort if other things you try don't work, they take some weeks to build up in your system but I mean you don't necessarily have to be on them for the rest of your life.

    The main thing is you have people around you who care, loneliness is a killer, don't push them away and if you feel you can confide in any of them then mention how you're feeling. Chances are at least some of them have felt the same way before or may be going through the same thing now.

    2 Thanks given to evilsatan

    4me2 (31st August 2018),  sparkzz (31st August 2018)  


  4. #4
    DF VIP Member Zippeyrude's Avatar
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    Firstly, top props for expressing how you feel...

    Unfortunately there is a tendency for people to hold stuff in, a stigma behind mental illness of any kind and a real lack of understanding.

    I see no harm in popping along to the Drs and explaining, there is well developed criteria for diagnosing thresholds / clinical depression and the docs wont just throw tablets at you needlessly.

    In parallel, evilsatan's tips seem sensible - diet, lifestype, etc all have an impact on mood as well as having people around you.

    Again, to man for mentioning it, I hope things begin to look up for you bud.

    Thanks to Zippeyrude

    sparkzz (31st August 2018)  


  5. #5
    DF VIP Member sparkzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    Quote Originally Posted by consoles View Post
    My best advice would be to print this off take it to a doctor who may refer you to someone who can help.
    Yeah, maybe you're right, I typed this with the cloud hanging last night.. seriously getting down with feeling like this.

    Quote Originally Posted by evilsatan View Post
    I wouldn't say anything is wrong with you, it sounds like what a doctor would label as depression/anxiety which is incredibly common so you're not alone.

    If you really didn't want to seek professional help then you could look into your diet and lifestyle to ensure you have the right balance of vitamins and exercise, it sounds like you were an outgoing person so try to force yourself out on the bike either alone or with some mates and see if that affects your state of mind, maybe join a gym and get into a routine. If you have money in the bank then look at some of your "life dreams", maybe book a holiday or activity that you wouldn't typically choose.

    If you were to visit a doctor you don't necessarily have to be prescribed meds, you can tell them that you'd rather explore options without medication and they may refer you to CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy) which could help depending on the type of person you are. If you were to be prescribed meds then it doesn't have to be a long term solution, you could view them as a safety net or last resort if other things you try don't work, they take some weeks to build up in your system but I mean you don't necessarily have to be on them for the rest of your life.

    The main thing is you have people around you who care, loneliness is a killer, don't push them away and if you feel you can confide in any of them then mention how you're feeling. Chances are at least some of them have felt the same way before or may be going through the same thing now.
    Great bit of advice, thank you so much for taking the time to type your thoughts, I think you maybe right, I used to be very active, mainly through cycling, I used to race so have been training for 7 years and was doing over 200 miles a week, road and MtB.. walking with the family, etc.. and was happy. due to a false alarm heart problem, I was forced to stop training while the tests were being done which took 6 months, then when I was given the all clear all the issues started and never got back on the bike properly, gave up the gym etc..

    Maybe you're right, I need to force myself on the exercise and bring it back that way, I am a sucker for routine so maybe this is what I am missing. Thank you again

    I've never spoken with anyone about this, my missus knows obviously, but she doesn't understand how hard it is, just thinks it will get better.

    Quote Originally Posted by Zippeyrude View Post
    Firstly, top props for expressing how you feel...

    Unfortunately there is a tendency for people to hold stuff in, a stigma behind mental illness of any kind and a real lack of understanding.

    I see no harm in popping along to the Drs and explaining, there is well developed criteria for diagnosing thresholds / clinical depression and the docs wont just throw tablets at you needlessly.

    In parallel, evilsatan's tips seem sensible - diet, lifestype, etc all have an impact on mood as well as having people around you.

    Again, to man for mentioning it, I hope things begin to look up for you bud.
    Thanks.. there was a video on YouTube recently that I watched which explains it so well.. so many lines in his lyrics which I can relate to.

    As you said Evilsatan's comments could be spot on. will defo try and get back into exercise

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    Quote Originally Posted by sparkzz View Post
    Sparkzz
    Life is fucking strange / mental issues are properly overlooked especially in males where we are deemed to be weak or whatever for expressing ourselves - good on you for reaching out etc.

    Thanks to prezzy

    sparkzz (1st September 2018)  


  7. #7
    DF VIP Member sparkzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Motivation / Stress - My Cloud

    Quote Originally Posted by prezzy View Post
    Life is fucking strange / mental issues are properly overlooked especially in males where we are deemed to be weak or whatever for expressing ourselves - good on you for reaching out etc.
    Indeed!.. I suppose one of the main reasons why people don't reach out, as they don't want to come across as weak, or to be judged! Life/the brain certainly sucks!.. I look around at some of my mates and it makes me angry as I think "why cant I just be normal like them!?!?"

    Thanks to sparkzz

    prezzy (1st September 2018)  


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