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  1. #1
    DF VIP Member tips's Avatar
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    Default Thick F**Kers them Yanks!

    S.A.T. TEST QUESTIONS

    The following questions and answers were actually collected from SAT tests given in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16-year-old students! (Don't laugh too hard----one of these kids may be the President someday.)

    Q: Name the four seasons.
    A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
    A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

    Q: How is dew formed?
    A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

    Q: What is a planet?
    A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

    Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
    A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

    Q: What are steroids?
    A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

    Q: What happens to your body as you age?
    A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

    Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
    A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

    Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
    A: Premature death.

    Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
    A: Keep it in the cow.

    Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

    Q: What is the Fibula?
    A: A small lie.

    Q: What does "varicose" mean?
    A: Nearby.

    Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
    A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

    Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section."
    A: The caesarian section is a district in Rome.

    Q: What is a seizure?
    A: A Roman emperor.

    Q: What is a terminal illness?
    A: When you are sick at the airport.

    Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
    A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

    Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
    A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

    Q: What is a turbine?
    A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

    Q: What is a Hindu?
    A: It lays eggs.

  2. #2
    DF VIP Member coin-op's Avatar
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    Urban myth - but no less funny for it
    Cheers - Coin-Op


  3. #3
    DF VIP Member Thrush's Avatar
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    No myth... its real

  4. #4
    DF VIP Member maverick_15's Avatar
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    to be honest if you gave british kids the same questions youd get some answers that were just as stupid
    "There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking." - Alfred Korzybski

    "Alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems" - Homer J. Simpson

  5. #5
    DF Member triggerh4ppy's Avatar
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    some of my favs :

    Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
    A: Premature death.

    Q: What is a seizure?
    A: A Roman emperor.

    Q: What is a turbine?
    A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

    Q: What is a Hindu?
    A: It lays eggs.

    LOL!!!!

  6. #6
    DF VIP Member tips's Avatar
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    Q: Name the four seasons.
    A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

    That's gotta be my favourite! Muhahahahah

  7. #7
    DF VIP Member GameKing's Avatar
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    they are superb.
    this must have been by a chinese kid.
    Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
    A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
    lol

  8. #8
    DF VIP Member big man's Avatar
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    This one is brilliant:

    Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
    A: Keep it in the cow.

    And so true
    I am a loud man with a very large hat. This means I am in charge

    Never argue with an idiot. They will bring you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

  9. #9
    DF VIP Member monsta's Avatar
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    Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
    A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

    hahahahahahaha class

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