Last night world leaders were again in uproar as America announced a shock addition to its controversial Axis of Evil.
President Bush made the shock announcement in a surprise press conference late last night. President Bush, seen by many as the sole cause of many of the world's current problems, launched a blistering attack on the people and culture of Wales. At one point going as far as to claim that the people of Wales are 'less good at stuff than other people'. Commentators have noted that the language used in the comment indicates that Bush himself added this particular insult.
Bush presented a dossier of evidence justifying his decision to include Wales into the Axis of Evil.
The charges include:
• An annoying accent
• Welsh Male choirs
• Having a mythical creature on their flag
• Excessively high sheep to man ratio
• Over abundance of velcro loves
• Tom Jones during the 80's
• High Unemployment
• The Welsh language
• Long place names
• Overly high sense on national pride
• A desire for self rule
Tony Blair has already announced his support for Bush's moves and is putting a motion before parliament that Wales be expelled from the United Kingdom and that Great Britain be renamed Even Greater Britain to signify that the UK is better off without the Welsh.
Sane people throughout the developed world and Wales have lambasted Bush's plans a pure lunacy. Anti-American lobbyists are claiming that this move would allow America to invade Wales and gain a foothold in Europe. This is widely seen as the next logical step for Americas planned domination of the world.
The White house has denied that there would be any move to invade Wales without first pretending to go through the UN.
The White house has further claimed that even though Wales has no military of its own, it has waged a moral war on the west through its over use of double L in words such as Llewlyn and Llandudno.
A spokesman for the Welsh assembly has called the American moves barbaric and pointless.
"No one pays any attention to us anyway," claimed the spokesman, "what's the point of singling us out for this punishment. The Americans have gone too far this time. Someone has to stand up to their bullying. Surely Europe now has the power to defend its own member states. How can Tony Blair put up with this?"
The European parliament has yet to issue a statement as the relevant documents have to be translated into the various member languages. Any statement is thought to be some time away as it has still to be agreed what extra benefits the French farmers will be given.
"I'm not a fan of the Welsh," claimed President Bush, "In fact I think Israel has every right to occupy them following the recent Welsh Infitada [uprising]. The people of Israel deserve the same rights to lead a life free from the fear of terror as the rest of the world. I don't condone the Israeli incursions into Wales, or their occupation of the Welsh refugee camps but I do respect Israel's right to defend itself and take what action they see fit to maintain national security. The Welsh militant group Taffas must realise that real and meaningful change can only come about through proper use of the political process and not through the use of force. I would also like to say that Iraq, North Korea, Afghanistan and Iran are all exceptions to this rule and America is perfectly justified in our use of force there. I would also like to say that the no use of force rule does not apply to Israel as they are a special case and shouldn't face sanctions for the misery they inflict on the Welsh people who, as I've already stated, are part of the axis of evil."
President Bush, who doesn't had any qualifications in geography, performed his usual end of speech stunt by running from the stage screaming "I'll get you, I'll get you good," at the now mocking journalists.
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