Q: Why is a martini like a woman's tits?
A: One is not enough, and three are too many.
Q: Why is air a lot like sex?
A: Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
Q: Why is being in the Army like a PG movie?
A: Too much violence and too little sex.
Q: Why is being in the military like a blow job?
A: The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
Q: Why is giving a Blow Job a win/lose situation?
A:. He may have you on your knees, but you have him by the balls!
Q: Why is life like a penis?
A: Because when it's soft it's hard to beat, but when it's hard you get
Q: Why is sex is like software?
A: For every one who pays for it, there are hundreds getting it free.
Q: Why is sex so much like drugs?
A: Because the quality depends on the pusher.
Q: Why was the two piece bikini invented?
A: To separate the meat section from the dairy section.
Q: Why won't cannibals eat divorced women?
A: They're very bitter.
Q:. How are all men multi-orgasmic?
A: They have one small one while having sex with "their" woman and a second,
much bigger one the next day while telling their buddies about it.