A man walks into the church and sits in the confession booth. He says to the priest, Father I have sinned, I was golfing yesterday and I cursed.
The priest replied, Well would you like to tell me about it?
Well I was on the seventh hole and I had just hit my best drive of the day. It was straight ahead, middle of the fairway, and a long, long way out there. So feeling pretty good about myself I walked to wards my ball, but as I got within 30 feet of it, a squirrel ran out of the forest and grabbed my ball.
The priest interrupted, "OOOhhh I see, that's when you cursed."
The man replied, "0h no Father, I did not curse then, but as the squirrel was running away, it reached the edge of the fairway and was quickly caught by a hawk, which promptly flew way up high into the air."
Once again the priest interrupted, "That must have been when you cursed then."
But the man continued,"No Father, the hawk started flying away and I followed it because it flew in the direction of the green. As it passed over the green, it dropped the squirrel out of its talons, causing the squirrel to drop my ball about 3 feet from the pin."
The priest interrupts one more time, "Oh, don’t tell me you missed the fucking putt!"
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