Little Johnny

[the_wizzard]

Little Johnny

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Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her first-grade pupils.

"Little Johnny, what is your problem?"

Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first Grade. My sister is in
third grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
third-grade too!"

Ms Brooks had enough, so she took Johnny to the principal's office.

The principal agreed that he would give the boy a test and if he
failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade
and behave.

He started by asking Johnny some simple arithmetic. "What is three
times three?"

"Nine, Sir."

"How much is nine times six?"

"Fifty-four."

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade
should know.

The principal looked at Ms. Brooks and said, "I think Johnny can go to
third grade! He seems smart enough."

Ms Brooks said to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"

The principal and Johnny both agreed.

Ms Brooks asked, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two
of?"

Johnny, after a moment, answered "Legs, Ma'am"

"What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

"Pockets!"

"OK, what does a dog do that a man steps into?"

"Pants."

"What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and
contains thin whitish liquid?"

"Coconut."

"What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the
answer, Johnny was taking charge. "Bubblegum!"

What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog
does on three legs?"

"Shake hands, Ma'am."

"Now for some 'Who am I' sort of questions, OK? First one.

You stick your pole inside me, you tie me down to get me up, and I get
wet before you do."

Johnny, quick as ever, answered, "Tent!"

"OK, a finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The
best man always has me first."

The Principal was looking restless and a bit tense. But Johnny was on
the ball with "Wedding Ring!"

"I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me,
you feel good."

"Nose."

"Right, I have a stiff shaft, my tip penetrates, and I come with a
quiver."

"Arrow."

"Good, now for the last one. What word starts with an 'F', ends in
'K', and means a lot of heat and excitement?"
"Firetruck, Ma'am!"

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher, Send
him to bloody university, I got the last ten questions wrong myself!"

Enjoy your day, you dirty minded people.

[super mike]

i liked that a lot mate

[dtsrulez]

That was class mate nice one.

[Shambles]

Splendid.

[Spennyboy]

haha, i love it :thumbs

[Shotgunjim]

Quality

[Apocalypse]

buwahaha, superb mate