Abortion

[burner1]

Why is it treated like nothing more than a tooth ache these days?.. kids go out, fuck around, get pregnant and look at the consequences likes it's nothing more than a fucking liability for a few hours. I've had a lot of shit from my neice this past week or so as to what she should do for the best regarding her 'condition' and have tried to be as supportive in any way I can etc.. get rid if it's not the right time for you, keep it if it's what you really want etc.. and what does she do? change her mind every time I talk to her about it.. feel like strangling her right now . She can't talk to her mum about it as she would go ballistic so I guess she needs a shoulder, but sometimes I feel like wringing her neck. I can't even get the issue of STD through to her, there's too many big words in that for her if I spell it out.

- And no... her condition is nothing to do with me, just annoyed with her attitude towards it all.

[BertRoot]

Kids these days and all through the ages have had little regard for life, myself included. It is only as you mature and realise the true value of life that this sort of thing starts to rile you. Just try and keep a level head with her and try and steer her in the direction that will cause her the least pain in her future life. You are her uncle and I am sure you are reasonably qualified to guide her young mind.

[CzarJunkie]

- And no... her condition is nothing to do with me, just annoyed with her attitude towards it all.

I'm glad you made that clear.............

Sex and irresponsible teenagers, it's an age old problem. Facts are human females are designed to give birth from 11-12 onwards. This is as a result of millions of years of evolution and nothing a few rules made up by the church and later the state, are going to change that.

So as soon as those hormones start flowing they want to start experimenting. Reproduction is our most basic instinct and nothing will ever deter teenagers from having sex.

Some people suggest greater efforts at educating them to the facts of becoming a single mother, or contracting a STD. And I've no doubt that works in some small part but I think we need to become less obsessed with sex (that's rich coming from me I know) and treat it as it is, a natural expression of our existance.

Frowning on teenagers having sex no doubt fuels the whole experience for them. The more forbidden you make something the more attractive it is to rebelious teenagers.

So I suggest the government pour money into a sex academies and make it a sport. With enough funding I think Sex could be introduced to the 2012 Olympics, maybe not as a full event, but certainly as an exhibition event.

[Roo]

So I suggest the government pour money into a sex academies and make it a sport. With enough funding I think Sex could be introduced to the 2012 Olympics, maybe not as a full event, but certainly as an exhibition event.

Lmao.

Burner, do you know who the would be 'father' is? Maybe you should go and have words wth him? I dont mean like beat him up or anything, but just to see how he feels about the whole thing, maybe sit them both down and do the Jeremy Kyle thing?

I agree though, Abortion is thrown around as a type of contraception these days, rather than a last resort.

I think you're doing the right thing, just being there mate. Especially as you're probably the only one shes told? Maybe though it might be worth trying to convince her to tell her mum?

[Little John]

I am happy your neice has had the guts to at least seek advice, be suportive and advise her but let her make the desision.

I have no problem with abortion as long as that is what both parents think is best, unfortunalty alot of kids now see a baby as a free ride to a house and benefits for 16/18 years and not a life where you have someone who is dependent on you putting food in their mouths and a roof over their head.

I would hate the thought of having a child to look after full time at anything under 20 teenage years are brillaint and need to be experianced without a baby in tow. early 20's you have money to spare well I did and have a fantastic time Late 20s you start thinking about a family and all that goes with it. I dont think a teenager has matured enough to look after a child.

I hope she makes the correct desision for herself but she need her mum to be involved in the desision as it will be her that will be most likley to end up looking after te baby.

The other option is addoption there are thousands of women who are uable to give birth and would make fantastic parents maybe this could be an option for her newborns are always in demand.

[Cenus_]

This is a subject I feel fairly qualified to comment on.

About 4 years ago (when I was nowt but an impressionable 19 year old) my girlfriend at the time told me she had fallen pregrant (with my child) and had abortion before telling me. I was absolutly devastated, it felt like being robbed, I think so long as he isn't a complete reprobate the potential father should be involved.

There's a girl I used to know who had three abortions within a couple of years and while I don't have an issue with abortion from a moral standpoint I used to worry how it would affect her mentally.

My last girlfirend had an abortion at the age of 17 and while she freely admitted it would of screwed her life up no end she regrets it every day.

Its a very difficult subject and women tend to feel very differently to men on the matter, wich makes your job that much harder.

All you can do is be there for her, try and layout the facts and her options. Whatever you do though once she has made her decision make sure you support her 100%.

Good luck mate, I feel you're gonna need it.

[maverick_15]

My last girlfirend had an abortion at the age of 17 and while she freely admitted it would of screwed her life up no end she regrets it every day.

What cenus has written above is the real problem. Although it's something that can potentially adversely affect your life it's still no guarantee that she could have one, especially if, for example, she has other friends who've had abortions and then regretted it. This could have a large bearing on her decision. Good luck to you and to her.

[Karoline]

Oh, i am not going to get into this much because i could take all day.
Cenus, you say a girl has 3 abortions in the last year.. Why on earth is she not taking contraceptive pill or anything? Maybe the 1st time is acceptable, by being pregnant 3 times, and getting an abortion 3 times. That just annoys me.. Especially when people that want children can't have them , then you hear of someone , who obviously doesnt want kids, but continues to conceive them, then have an abortion.. Just dont think this is right.
To me, i personally would never have an abortion, unless i would die as a case of giving birth to it. A Human life is a very important thing, and when you have an abortion you are killing the life. Wether or not anyone thinks, i do think that it is murder. That baby is a human, it is breathing and has vital organs and such, therfore it is human, and should not be destroyed.
I wouldn't want to actually have an abortion myself, but i have no problem in others having one, if thats what they feel is best, because sometimes it will be.

It is good your niece wants to talk to someone. Shame is isnt her mother though, i do think in this cirumstance she would be good to talk to.
What age is your niece?

[Cenus_]

Cenus, you say a girl has 3 abortions in the last year.. Why on earth is she not taking contraceptive pill or anything? Maybe the 1st time is acceptable, by being pregnant 3 times, and getting an abortion 3 times. That just annoys me..

100% agree.

[marcode]

have it killed.. unless she has any means of supporting or paying for it, then why in fucks name would you even consider keeping it. the fact that she changes her mind constantly and has no clue about STD's just solidifys my opinion further.

last fucking thing we need is more young mothers scrounging off the state and doing fuck all with themselves till little britney is 16 and up the duff herself... the circle continues.

[burner1]

Thanks for the input guys and girls. I guess I was in a F*ckin livid mood when I posted the OP, I want to help out but personally, I am really against abortion without good reason so it's hard to stay neutral but I've managed to keep my personal views out of the equation.

She's 17, has great potential career wise, loves the clubbing etc (Looks older, and we all been there at that age)..
I met up with her today and had a chat, I asked her what she seen as the pro's and cons as I felt I needed to get into her mindset on it without me blurting what my view on them were.. and as some of you have mentioned, it's a tricky one and we went through the options; get rid, learn from it and ensure it doesn't happen again.. get on with her plans for the future and enjoy herself however she wants to... but; with the strong possibility as she gets a little older she will regret it everytime she sees another child (Wether her own or someone else'), I know from what some of my female friends have told me over the years it is something they never forget, or forgive themselves.

Then the option of having the baby will see her have to make some drastic changes in her priorities. I said I personally feel she has a lot of 'living' to do before she settles down or is put in a position that she has to stay around in one place for some years, she's travelled a lot even at her young age and loves it (her dad moves all over the world and she spends time visiting him) , so that would have to change for some time. As for clubbin, girls nights out etc.. that won't be as simple to pencil in. She's certainly not a tart but loves going out whenever she can, she works hard, plays hard sort of thing.

By this point she seemed to be swaying towards an abortion so I felt it was only right to point out the pro's.. I said that things may seem to point to abortion (Me biting my lip bigtime by now), but there is nothing like bringing a child into the world and watching it grow, developing their individual character and nothing can compare with the way you feel when they do the simplest of things for the first time or seeing a 'part' of yourself in them etc..

Her mum in my eyes, and hers, is a diamond.. but... she has some very old fashioned values and whilst that is no great shame, in this modern world it can be a drawback when it comes to getting pregnant and we both feel mum would simply insist she has the baby no arguments, and she doesn't want to fall out with mum at this point when she hasn't made a decision.

I've said that she should to talk to people who have been there regarding abortion. As a man, I couldn't even begin to comprehend how it feels to go through such a thing, so I've spoken to a good female friend who's been there and she is more than happy to meet up with my neice on Monday and have a chat, I know she won't try and deter her from having an abortion, but maybe explain the more detailed thoughts and feelings she may go through later in life as, sometimes, when I talk to my neice, she gives me the impression it's not much more emotionally different than deciding what to wear for a night out.

[beekae]

have it killed.. unless she has any means of supporting or paying for it, then why in fucks name would you even consider keeping it. the fact that she changes her mind constantly and has no clue about STD's just solidifys my opinion further.

last fucking thing we need is more young mothers scrounging off the state and doing fuck all with themselves till little britney is 16 and up the duff herself... the circle continues.

Real nice post Marcode

[God is a DJ]

have it killed.. unless she has any means of supporting or paying for it, then why in fucks name would you even consider keeping it. the fact that she changes her mind constantly and has no clue about STD's just solidifys my opinion further.

last fucking thing we need is more young mothers scrounging off the state and doing fuck all with themselves till little britney is 16 and up the duff herself... the circle continues.

well said

DJ