Close

Results 1 to 11 of 11
  1. #1
    DF General DogsBody
    Mickey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Digital Forums
    Posts
    16,955
    Thanks
    1,879
    Thanked:        2,077
    Karma Level
    1256

    Default Beijing's penis emporium

    Source:http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programme...nt/5371500.stm



    LOL didnt know where to post this, possible 3 locations


    There are many thousands of Chinese restaurants around in the UK and everyone has their favourite dish, but only in China itself do chefs specialise in a range of slightly more unusual delicacies.
    <!-- S IIMA --><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=203 align=right border=0><TBODY><TR><TD> Many of the restaurant's guests are wealthy businessmen

    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE><!-- E IIMA -->
    The dish in front of me is grey and shiny.
    "Russian dog," says my waitress Nancy.
    "Big dog," I reply.
    "Yes," she says. "Big dog's penis..."
    We are in a cosy restaurant in a dark street in Beijing but my appetite seems to have gone for a stroll outside.
    Nancy has brought out a whole selection of delicacies.
    They are draped awkwardly across a huge platter, with a crocodile carved out of a carrot as the centrepiece.
    Nestling beside the dog's penis are its clammy testicles, and beside that a giant salami-shaped object.
    "Donkey," says Nancy. "Good for the skin..."
    She guides me round the penis platter.
    "Snake. Very potent. They have two penises each."
    I did not know that.
    Deer-blood cocktail
    "Sheep... horse... ox... seal - excellent for the circulation."
    She points to three dark, shrivelled lumps which look like liquorice allsorts - a special treat apparently - reindeer, from Manchuria.
    <!-- S IBOX --><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=208 align=right border=0><TBODY><TR><TD width=5></TD><TD class=sibtbg> Government officials... two of them... they're having the penis hotpot


    Nancy

    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE><!-- E IBOX -->
    The Guolizhuang restaurant claims to be China's only speciality penis emporium, and no, it is not a joke.
    The atmosphere is more exotic spa than boozy night-out.
    Nancy describes herself as a nutritionist.
    "We don't call them waiters here. And we don't serve much alcohol," she says. "Only common people come here to get drunk and laugh."
    But she does offer me a deer-blood and vodka cocktail, which I decide to skip.
    Medicinal purposes
    The restaurant's gristly menu was dreamt up by a man called Mr Guo.
    <!-- S IIMA --><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=203 align=right border=0><TBODY><TR><TD> The Chinese believe that eating penis can enhance your virility

    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE><!-- E IIMA -->
    He is 81 now and retired.
    After fleeing China's civil war back in 1949, he moved to Taiwan, and then to Atlanta, Georgia, where he began to look deeper into traditional Chinese medicine, and experiment on the appendages of man's best friend.
    Apparently, they are low in cholesterol and good, not just for boosting the male sex drive, but for treating all sorts of ailments.
    Laughter trickles through the walls of our dining room.
    "Government officials," says Nancy. "Two of them upstairs. They're having the penis hotpot."
    Most of the restaurant's guests are either wealthy businessmen or government bureaucrats who, as Nancy puts it, have been brought here by people who want their help.
    What better way to secure a contract than over a steaming penis fondue.
    Discretion is assured as all the tables are in private rooms.
    The glitziest one has gold dishes.
    "Some like their food served raw," says Nancy, "like sushi. But we can cook it anyway you like."
    Rare order
    "Not long ago, a particularly rich real estate mogul came in with four friends. All men. Women don't come here so often, and they shouldn't eat testicles," says Nancy solemnly.
    The men spent $5,700 (£3,000) on a particularly rare dish, something that needed to be ordered months in advance.
    "Tiger penis," says Nancy.
    <!-- S IIMA --><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=203 align=right border=0><TBODY><TR><TD> Bull's perineum is also a delicacy

    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE><!-- E IIMA -->
    The illegal trade in tiger parts is a big problem in China.
    Campaigners say the species is being driven towards extinction because of its popularity as a source of traditional medicine.
    I mention this, delicately, to Nancy, but she insists that all her tiger supplies come from animals that have died of old age.
    "Anyway, we only have one or two orders a year," she says.
    "So what does it taste like?" I ask.
    "Oh, the same as all the others," she says blithely.
    And does it have any particular potency? "No. People just like to order tiger to show off how much money they have."
    Welcome to the People's Republic of China - tigers beware.
    Sliced and pickled
    "Oh yes," she adds, "the same group also ate an aborted reindeer foetus.
    "That is very good for your skin. And here it is..."
    Another "nutritionist" walks in bearing something small and red wrapped in cling film.
    My appetite is heading for the airport.
    Still, I think, it would be rude not to try something.
    I am normally OK about this sort of thing. I have had fried cockroaches and sheep's eyes, so...
    There is a small bowl of sliced and pickled ox penis on the table.
    I pick up a piece with my chopsticks and start to chew. It is cold and bland and rubbery.
    Nancy gives me a matronly smile. "This one," she says, "should be eaten every day."

  2. #2
    DF Super Moderator
    evilsatan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Essex
    Posts
    20,082
    Thanks
    1,105
    Thanked:        3,242
    Karma Level
    1543

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    ewww and I am just about to leave for work delivering at my local chinese lol


  3. #3
    DF General DogsBody
    Mickey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Digital Forums
    Posts
    16,955
    Thanks
    1,879
    Thanked:        2,077
    Karma Level
    1256

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Quote Originally Posted by evilsatan View Post
    ewww and I am just about to leave for work delivering at my local chinese lol

    Well were having a chinky tonight, Hope its not a todger from a dog or summat

  4. #4
    DF VIP Member wakadoo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    notts
    Posts
    3,341
    Thanks
    139
    Thanked:        365
    Karma Level
    472

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Quote Originally Posted by Mickey Mutant View Post
    Well were having a chinky tonight, Hope its not a todger from a dog or summat

    better not get the pork balls then m8...................


    Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean
    the same thing?

  5. #5
    DF General DogsBody
    Mickey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Digital Forums
    Posts
    16,955
    Thanks
    1,879
    Thanked:        2,077
    Karma Level
    1256

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Quote Originally Posted by wakadoo View Post
    better not get the pork balls then m8...................

    feck i dint think of that
    ill go with the prawn balls instead

  6. #6
    DF VIP Member consoles's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Way out there
    Posts
    2,710
    Thanks
    365
    Thanked:        874
    Karma Level
    396

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Quote Originally Posted by Mickey Mutant View Post
    feck i dint think of that
    ill go with the prawn balls instead
    dogs clit ?
    Only in Britain….do we use the word “politics” to describe the process of Government. “Poli” in Latin meaning “many” and “tics” meaning “bloodsucking
    creatures”

  7. #7
    DF Super Moderator {{909}}'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    China
    Posts
    16,232
    Thanks
    396
    Thanked:        1,385
    Karma Level
    1342

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    i bet theres plenty of cock in our sausages and pork pies etc. we all love the taste of cock in our mouths

  8. #8
    DF VIP Member
    Nibb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    Cymru
    Posts
    16,864
    Thanks
    554
    Thanked:        1,118
    Karma Level
    1745

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Heres an apt ringtone for this thread!

    Knob News
    Last edited by Nibb; 21st September 2007 at 10:20 PM.
    "Where you are is what you eat. When I'm in London I'll have beans on toast for lunch. On holiday � what? Tapas? Go on then I'll have a bit. You eat whatevers in that area"
    Karl Pilkington

  9. #9
    DF VIP Member BOYYAKKA's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    somewhere
    Posts
    1,840
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked:        0
    Karma Level
    390

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    eating the penis never dun my lady any harm.

    well besides giving her a chinese smile

  10. #10
    DF VIP Member GameKing's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Pits of Hell
    Posts
    12,798
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked:        2
    Karma Level
    1439

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    you can`t beat having a good chew on a big dog dick is all I can say.

  11. #11
    DF VIP Member
    Nibb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    Cymru
    Posts
    16,864
    Thanks
    554
    Thanked:        1,118
    Karma Level
    1745

    Default Re: Beijing's penis emporium

    Speaking from experience m8?

    Whats the best tho a big dog or dick!
    Last edited by Nibb; 22nd September 2007 at 01:59 AM.
    "Where you are is what you eat. When I'm in London I'll have beans on toast for lunch. On holiday � what? Tapas? Go on then I'll have a bit. You eat whatevers in that area"
    Karl Pilkington

Similar Threads

  1. Dear Penis
    By 4me2 in forum The Dog and Duck
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 9th March 2003, 12:36 AM
  2. forename.surname has a small penis.com
    By God is a DJ in forum The Dog and Duck
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 7th March 2003, 05:33 PM
  3. Man Cuts Off Penis, Tosses It to His Wife
    By Tattooed Freak in forum The Dog and Duck
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 5th March 2003, 12:14 AM
  4. Exploding Penis
    By Robbie in forum The Dog and Duck
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 6th February 2003, 06:06 PM
  5. Penis Study
    By ibobsy in forum The Comedy Club
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 5th February 2003, 04:37 PM

Social Networking Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •