Spunking on a bird while she's asleep

[jimbob2002]

I've already posted about this when it happened about a year ago, but I thought it is a good story to put in the confession section.

Anyway I was shagging this bird, We'd been shagging for ages, we'd had a bit of coke earlier that night, which normally means I can go for ages but cant cum. So we were both knackered and finallly gave in. She promptly fell asleep and I was sat there with a hard on that wasnt going to go away.
I was rather disappointed so I decided to try having a wank and surprise surprise I started to feel that I was about to fire, so I tunred round and tried to wake her up, but she was fast sleep and wouldnt wake up, so I thought waste not want not, there's a naked bird beside me, and I'm ready to spray my muck, so I moved round to the other side of the bed and stood over her and shot my load all over her tits.
There was fair bit and it some of it kind of collected into a little pool near her neck. In the morning as she'd moved around in her sleep my spunk had ran round her body and down her back and arm, she's a black girl so the dried white spunk lines stood out quite prominently, I tried to wipe it off before she woke up but it was just flaking all over the bed so I left it. Anyway she got up and showered and never said anything and neither did I.

[Mickey]

Nice story, lol i once did it to a bird that woudlnt open her legs to me. Years before meeting the wifey
Anyhow went all over her face and she woke up. strange how we finished a few days later

[liveseytowers]

haha top effort. Extra funny because she was black and covered in white goo

[eggon]

haha top effort. Extra funny because she was black and covered in white goo

Racist

[liveseytowers]

Racist

It would be just as funny if he had some weird disease and shot a load of black goo on a white burd as well

[eggon]

It would be just as funny if he had some weird disease and shot a load of black goo on a white burd as well

[jimbob2002]

It would be just as funny if he had some weird disease and shot a load of black goo on a white burd as well

Isnt that shitting on a bird? That's a whole other story....

[I Black Belt]

I once tapped off with something very decent looking for a change.
Went back to hers and started getting naughty.
So i'm just about ready to slip it in, when she fires out the room, into the bathroom and starts spewing for England.
So there's me, with a woody you could bend iron bars over and there's her on all fours talking to god on the big white telephone.
So being the gentleman i am, I popped it in from behind and banged the arse off it while she was still being sick..
She didn't seem keen on seeing me again after that funnily enough..

[Nikki]

buhahahah should of splutted it on her face and rubbed it in. then wiped it on the curtains.

[I Black Belt]

Anybody ever been with a bird who's skin reacts to spunk?

Went out with one bird and after marming all over her face, and leaving said marm in place whilst I finished eating her out I found that when she wiped it off, there was a definite "rash" almost where the marm had been.

[inspectercoley]

spewing for England.
So being the gentleman i am, I popped it in from behind and banged the arse off it while she was still being sick..
She didn't seem keen on seeing me again after that funnily enough..

I hear wolfbanging is quite nice?!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...olfbanging&r=f

When you partake in anal sex, when the man is about to orgasm he sticks his fingers down his partners throat to make them puke, thus making her arse hole muslce tighten and make the orgasm feel better.

[jimbob2002]

I hear wolfbanging is quite nice?!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...olfbanging&r=f

When you partake in anal sex, when the man is about to orgasm he sticks his fingers down his partners throat to make them puke, thus making her arse hole muslce tighten and make the orgasm feel better.

This is similar to the donkey punch, where at the point of blowing your load you smack your bitch on the back of her head thus knocking her out and apparently this also tightens her backdoor up for enhanced pleasure.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=donkey+punch

[Nikki]

Anybody ever been with a bird who's skin reacts to spunk?

Went out with one bird and after marming all over her face, and leaving said marm in place whilst I finished eating her out I found that when she wiped it off, there was a definite "rash" almost where the marm had been.

exma hates man muck so i have heard from the ex.

[RSV]

I hear wolfbanging is quite nice?!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...olfbanging&r=f

When you partake in anal sex, when the man is about to orgasm he sticks his fingers down his partners throat to make them puke, thus making her arse hole muslce tighten and make the orgasm feel better.

You can get the same result by holding her head down the toilet, apparantely when she is just on the point of drowning the old muscles go crazy lol not that that kinda thing floats my boat

[Nikki]

You can get the same result by holding her head down the toilet, apparantely when she is just on the point of drowning the old muscles go crazy lol not that that kinda thing floats my boat

talking from experience chris ?

[RSV]

My favourite is the:

The Houdinni

(For the males) The act of, while in the doggy style position; to stop, spit on the partners back and pretend like u finished, when the partner turns around to show there happyness of the love making, the male proceeds to ejaculate on the womens face and then laugh.....

[Nikki]

My favourite is the:

The Houdinni

(For the males) The act of, while in the doggy style position; to stop, spit on the partners back and pretend like u finished, when the partner turns around to show there happyness of the love making, the male proceeds to ejaculate on the womens face and then laugh.....

thats a bloody good idea. will have to try that. hope i dont have a bad throat at the time as could get very messey.

[jimbob2002]

or the abe lincoln, thats a combination of a few things.

Shag her doggy style, do the donkey punch, cum on her face, then shave her pubes off and stick em to her face like shes got a beard like abraham lincoln.
Its a real crowd favourite.

But the bitches sometimes get upset when they regain conciousness.
Best to take some photo's while she's still out cold.

[RSV]

Just found another definition of the houdinni havent tried this.... yet.....

The Houdinni

The act of performing doggy style to a woman who is blind folded , while a friend hides somewhere in the room, and half way through you switch with your friend, and leave the room or house and stand infront of the window and wave to the girl as your friend unties the blindfold.

[inspectercoley]

Go web is the same as the doggy surprise only you spit on their back and instead spunk in your hand and then when she turns around you shout go web and sling in into her face