Ian and Mark fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money,
altogether they had a staggering 50 pence.
Mark said 'Hang on I've an idea' - went into the butchers shop nextdoor and came out with one large Cumberland Sausage.
Ian - 'Are you crazy? Now we haven't got any money left at all'
Mark said 'Don't worry - just follow me' and went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints and two large Jack Daniels'
Ian - 'Now you have lost it - do you know how much trouble we will be in we haven't got any money!!'
Mark- 'Don't worry - I've got a plan - Cheers'
They had their drinks and Mark said 'OK, I will now stick the sausage through my zip - you get on your knees and put it in your mouth'
Said and done - the landlord noticed it, went berserk and threw them out.
They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk -all for free.
At the 10th pub Ian said 'Mate - I don't think I can continue this any longer - I am totally wasted and my knees are killing me'
Mark - 'How do you think I feel - I lost the sausage in the 3rd pub'