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Thread: Mens Nightmares

  1. #1
    DF VIP Member Jesta's Avatar
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    Default Mens Nightmares

    Nightmare #1
    After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled
    out
    a
    cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.Unable to find
    it,
    he
    asked the girl if she had one at hand."There might be some matches
    in
    the
    top drawer," she replied. He opened the drawer of the bedside table
    and
    found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of
    another
    man. Naturally, the guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he
    inquired nervously. "No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him.
    "Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said,
    nibbling
    away
    at his ear. "Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy.
    Calmly,
    the girl replied, "That's me before the operation."

    Nightmare #2
    The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to
    think
    of
    a way to rekindle it. One night he came from work, and found his
    wife
    asleep
    in bed. He thought
    to himself, "what should I do? Oh- I know."
    He proceeded to get under the covers and go down on his wife. Soon
    she
    began
    to gently squirm and moan in pleasure. After a few minutes, her body
    spasmed
    with ecstasy as she climaxed.

    Afterwards, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his
    teeth.
    When
    he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife there shaving her
    legs.
    He exclaimed, "What are you doing in here?!? " She said, "Shhhh!,"
    pointing
    at the bed, "You'll wake your mother!"

    Nightmare #3
    One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. As they are about to kiss
    each
    other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling a little
    horny.With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the
    wall
    and
    smiling, he says to her,
    "Honey, would you give me a blow job?" Horrified, she replies, "Are
    you
    mad?
    My parents will see us!"
    "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asks grining at
    her.
    "No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"
    "Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!"
    "No way. It's just too risky!"
    "Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?"
    "No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!"
    "Oh yes you can. Please?"
    "No, no. I just can't"
    "I'm begging you ... "

    Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl's
    sister
    shows up in her pyjamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she
    says,
    "Dad says to go ahead and give him a blow job, or I can do it. Or if
    need
    be, mom says she can come down herself and do it. But for God's sake
    tell
    him to take his hand off the intercom!!!!!!!!!

  2. #2
    DF VIP Member {film_man}'s Avatar
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    Default

    hehe

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