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  1. #1
    DF Wh0re terrysmr2's Avatar
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    Default Signs You've Had A Bad Date With A Girl

    SIGNS YOU'VE HAD A BAD DATE WITH A GIRL



    * Not only is she a little young, but you're sure that you used to date her mother.

    * You find out her real name is Vinnie, and you used to play little league with her.

    * She has a thicker mustache than you.

    * When you go to pick her up, her lawyer meets you at the door with a contract describing your duties and restrictions.

    * You jokingly ask her if she wants to go down to Atlantic City and get married. She then informs you that leaving the state is a violation of her parole.

    * Her bra and panties are wired to an alarm system.

    * You walk away from her front door with the roses you got her shoved up your ass.

    * You are the first guy that she's gone out with that isn't her cousin.

    * At the end of the night she gives you a coupon that is good for a free shot of penicillin at the nearest clinic.

    * She beats the crap out of some guy for making fun of your hair cut.

    * You wake up the next morning with a wicked hang-over. In the bed next to you is Janet Reno.

    * At the end of the night, you drop her off at her house, and her pimp is waiting there with your bill.

    * You wake up to find your loins covered with purple and green spots, with an intense itching in your left thigh.

    * She keeps staring at you all through dinner, then finally asks if you want to meet Satan.

    * She is better hung than you.

    * She constantly complains that her cat won't stop laughing at her.

    * She informs you that you can't go out again because her spirit guide doesn't like you.

    * She informs you that you can't go out again because her boyfriend doesn't like you.

  2. #2
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    Mystical_2K's Avatar
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    a couple of those sounds familiar
    You know he grew up as a little shitspark from the old shitflint and then he turned into a shitbonfire and driven by the winds of his monumental ignorance he turned into a raging shitfirestorm. If I get to be married to Barb I'll have total control of Sunnyvale and then I can unleash the shitnami tidal wave that will engulf Ricky and extinguish his shitflames forever. And with any luck he'll drown in the undershit of that wave. Shitwaves.

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