Sorry if this has been posted before.
A standup comedian asks his audience if there are any virgins in...
An old biddy puts here hand up, "Yeah, I'm a virgin"
Comic-"You! A virgin?"
Old lady-"Yep, 68 years old, been married 3 times and still a virgin!"
Quite impressed with this, the comedian gets the old lady on stage to tell the audience her story...
Old lady- "68, still a virgin and been married 3 times...My first husband was an optician- he just liked to LOOK at it...My second husband was a Psychiatrist. He just wanted to TALK to it. My third husband was a stamp collector...I don't f*ckin' half miss him..."