As a result of the reduction of money budgeted
for the Department areas, we are forced to cut
our number of personnel.
Under the new plan, older employees will be
asked to accept early retirement, thus
permitting the retention of younger people who
represent our future plans.
Therefore, a program to phase out older
personnel by the end of the current fiscal year,
via retirement, will be placed in effect
immediately. The program will be known as
(Retire Aged Personnel Early).
Employees who are R.A.P.E.D. will be given the
opportunity to look for other employment
outside the company. Provided they are being
R.A.P.E.D., they can request a review of the
employment records before actual retirement
takes place. This phase of the operation will
be called S.C.R.E.W. (Survey of Capabilities
of Retired Early Workers).
All employees who have been R.A.P.E.D. or
S.C.R.E.W.E.D. may file an appeal with upper
management. This will be called S.H.A.F.T.
(Study by Higher Authority Following
Termination). Under the terms of the new
policies, employees may be R.A.P.E.D. once,
S.C.R.E.W.E.D. twice, but may be S.H.A.F.T.E.D.
as many times as the company deems appropriate.
If any employee follows the above procedure, he
or she will be entitled to get H.E.R.P.E.S.
(Half Earnings for Retired Personnel's Early
Severance). As H.E.R.P.E.S. is considered a
benefit plan. any employee who has received
H.E.R.P.E.S. will no longer be R.A.P.E.D. or
S.C.R.E.W.E.D. by the company.
Management wishes to assure younger employees
who remain on board that the company will
continue its policy to ensure that employees are
well trained through our Special High Intensity
Training (S.H.I.T.) program.
The company takes pride in the amount of S.H.I.T.
our employees receive. We have given our
employees more S.H.I.T. than any other company
in this area. If any employee feels he or she
does not receive enough S.H.I.T. on the job, see
your immediate supervisor, for your supervisor
is especially trained to make sure you recieve
all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.