Close

Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    DF Jedi CallmeGoose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    3,644
    Thanks
    2,635
    Thanked:        1,407
    Karma Level
    420

    Default Word Perfect Telephone call

    Dont know how much truth is in this conversation, but I found this online. Made me laugh! Done a search for previous posts but couldnt find any so thought I'd share...

    This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed
    from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to
    say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing
    the Word Perfect organization for “Termination without Cause”.

    Operator: “Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?”
    Caller: “Yes, well, I’m having trouble with WordPerfect.”
    Operator: “What sort of trouble??”
    Caller: “Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words
    went away.”
    Operator: “Went away?”
    Caller: “They disappeared.”
    Operator: “Hmm So what does your screen look like now?”
    Caller: “Nothing.”
    Operator: “Nothing??”
    Caller: “It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.”
    Operator: “Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??”
    Caller: “How do I tell?”
    Operator: “Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??”
    Caller: “What’s a sea-prompt?”
    Operator: “Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?”
    Caller: “There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept anything I
    type.”
    Operator: “Does your monitor have a power indicator??”
    Caller: “What’s a monitor?”
    Operator: “It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
    Does it have a little light that tells you when it’s on??”
    Caller: “I don’t know.”
    Operator: “Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
    power cord goes into it. Can you see that??”
    Caller: “Yes, I think so.”
    Operator: “Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s
    plugged into the wall.
    Caller: “Yes, it is.”
    Operator: “When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there
    were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??”
    Caller: “No.”
    Operator: “Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find
    the other cable.”
    Caller: “Okay, here it is.”
    Operator: “Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into
    the back of your computer.”
    Caller: “I can’t reach.”
    Operator: “Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??”
    Caller: “No.”
    Operator: “Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
    over??”
    Caller: “Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle – it’s
    because it’s dark.”
    Operator: “Dark??”
    Caller: “Yes – the office light is off, and the only light I have is
    coming in from the window.
    ” Operator: “Well, turn on the office light then.”
    Caller: “I can’t.”
    Operator: “No? Why not??”
    Caller: “Because there’s a power failure.”
    Operator: “A power……… A power failure? Aha, Okay, we’ve got it
    licked now.
    Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer
    came in??”
    Caller: “Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.”
    Operator: “Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just
    like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
    Bought it from.”
    Caller: “Really? Is it that bad?”
    Operator: “Yes, I’m afraid it is.”
    Caller: “Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??”
    Operator: “Tell them you’re too $*%ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!

  2. #2
    DF VIP Member
    Realist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Posts
    5,504
    Thanks
    236
    Thanked:        794
    Karma Level
    732

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    Posted before: [Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

    HOS I think.

    PS,

    Its that old god started this rumour years ago thats how old this joke is

  3. #3
    DF VIP Member
    Mule's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Surrey
    Posts
    9,097
    Thanks
    454
    Thanked:        976
    Karma Level
    1068

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    Really really old.

    Not sure if it's true, probably based on a true story at least.

    In the short time I worked in CS for a computer manufacturer (maybe 1 year) I had a guy who couldn't find the 'any' key (the guy had even had his neighbour round to help look for it) and someone really angry because their computer wouldn't respond to them, when questioned it turned out she was trying to talk to it (seen too many films, I sent her some voice recognition software). Oh, and I had the drink tray one as well (CD-drive tray).
    Last edited by Mule; 14th October 2010 at 07:20 PM.

  4. #4
    DF Jedi CallmeGoose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    3,644
    Thanks
    2,635
    Thanked:        1,407
    Karma Level
    420

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    ah well, 4 year old last time it was posted. still made me chuckle though

  5. #5
    DF PlaYa scullion's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    n ireland
    Posts
    730
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked:        1
    Karma Level
    258

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    I have heard/seen that one so many times over the years, cracks me up everytime.

    I do not understand how some people just lose their ability to think/process information as soon as they sit in front of a computer.

    But then again no matter how many times I have been shown how to work the washing machine, I still can hardly get the fucker going.

  6. #6
    DF Jedi CallmeGoose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    3,644
    Thanks
    2,635
    Thanked:        1,407
    Karma Level
    420

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    But then again no matter how many times I have been shown how to work the washing machine, I still can hardly get the fucker going.
    haha im the same

  7. #7
    DF PwNagE rIKmAN's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Stafford
    Posts
    6,503
    Thanks
    1,062
    Thanked:        645
    Karma Level
    632

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    Over the last few years I have taught my Mum (and to a lesser extent Dad too) to use a computer, first was to play simple games and get her used to using a mouse, but now she can use facebook, load her games, type documents etc - even found her teaching my Dad how to check his lottery which I thought was very cute lol!

    During this period I started thinking about what it must be like to simply "not understand" something.
    When you actually think back to what it was like when they were growing up, compared to the stuff we have around now, it must seem like utter magic!

    For example, wireless internet.
    It's common now and accepted in society, but when my parents were kids if someone said that they could send a picture, or a letter or anything through the air to space and back down to someone else on the other side of the fucking world within [i]seconds[/] they would have been locked up or burnt at the stake!

    I guess my point is that yes there are sometimes people who are stupid full stop, but I think that some people are genuinely scared of technology and really believe films and stories they hear, thus leading to a total shutdown of the "common sense" receptor in the brain when computers are concerned.

    It's a bit like me with a car

    ps. bit of a long pointless post haha, but I'd already typed it out so thought fuck it.

  8. #8
    DF Jedi CallmeGoose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    3,644
    Thanks
    2,635
    Thanked:        1,407
    Karma Level
    420

    Default Re: Word Perfect Telephone call

    how about this.... my replacement at work (im 3rd engineer onboard a ship). comes on - and each morning we have to enter the fuel figures into the log on the computer... he just simply looks at me (he is 55) and says ermmm.... ive never used a computer..as in NEVER.

    Stood there totally godsmacked, with the amount of things we rely on in every day life, this guy had never even touched one. i was amazed. so i had to show him how to use a mouse, double click on the file etc and use the keyboard. was like a monkey using tools for the first time..

Similar Threads

  1. batch process word files to be word templates
    By neilcritc in forum PC Software
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 19th February 2014, 05:16 PM
  2. Telephone call recording
    By Zippeyrude in forum Apple Mobile Devices
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 20th May 2011, 07:50 PM
  3. What does a telephone exchange look like?
    By DaMack in forum Internet Connections & VPNs
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 17th July 2006, 09:53 AM
  4. Perfect Man & Perfect Woman
    By the_wizzard in forum The Comedy Club
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 25th July 2005, 04:10 PM

Social Networking Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •