NSFW - Shocking tattoos

[prezzy]

Some people pay to have varicose veins removed. This guy took the opposite approach.

Ummm… Interesting?

Check out the tattoos below that these chicks got after they were fully pregnant. What will the tattoos look like after they give birth? Horrible, would be my guess.


Imagine if this tattoo were on a chick that got pregnant! That would be some spooky-looking shit.

It would be great to have this chick standing next to you the next time you were stuck in a line. You could just stare at her leg for a while.

Check out this butt tattoo. Do you like the twin penises arcing out?

I’m afraid that is not the last word in ass tattoos though. It gets worse. Check this shit out!


It gets even worse though. Much worse. You’ve been warned.

I still shudder every time I see that.
While you’re contemplating the pictures above, perhaps you could explain this tattoo to me?

Or this bacon tattoo?

Now the one below I certainly understand the appeal of. Goats are awesome.

And while I wouldn’t necessarily get these tattoos, I can at least appreciate their beauty, creativity or the talent required to produce them:







I love this one.



I’m afraid I couldn’t quite muster the same level of appreciation for these:
What the fuck is this and why would you place it permanently on your body?



And while I can identify these, I can’t quite see the appeal of permanent placement on one’s body:



And these just turn my stomach – the flesh removal tattoos:


I mean, look at this fucking process!

These are the chunks of flesh carved out of her body.

The end result is below. Not worth it to me…

These burned skin tattoos disturb me as well:



This didn’t disgust me as those above did and the tattoo actually looks pretty cool, but the process looks pretty brutal, doesn’t it?

And speaking of brutal, check out this body modification and tattoo mix:

These tattoos at least made me laugh:

[prezzy]

This guy’s never going to get laid…

The claim is that this is the world’s most tattooed man…

Dennis Smith is tattooed from head to toe with orange and black stripes and his teeth have been filed to needle point.
He has also had latex whiskers implanted and surgery to his lips so he has a permanent snarl. He now wants a surgeon to graft tiger fur on to his skin, like a perma-wig.
Mr Smith, who has changed his name by deed poll to Cat Man, said: “I have a collection of old tiger pelts from the days of hunting. I want these grafted on to me. It will cost another $100,000 but will be worth it. When I have the coat of a tiger, I feel I will have reached my goal in life.”
His fingernails have been crafted into sharp talons while his hands have tattooed markings like a tiger’s paws. He says he feels like a tiger.”
You may be wondering how this guy has managed to pay for all of this surgery. Well, this guy holds down a “$128,000-a-year computer programming” job.


Viva Las Vegas, baby…

I’d love to get my picture taken with this chick…

Jesus Christ. I guess the tip of this guy’s schlong is the dragon’s head? Pretty clever actually…

Apparently not a Microsoft fan. The blue screen of death…

Might be interesting to hang out with this guy…

Not sure if this is a commentary about Africa and the Middle East or not…

Eye tattoo? Fuck that. I couldn’t even put contacts in…

Eye tattooing: Yes, this is over the top…

Words fail me…


This chick is pretty confident. I’m not convinced her confidence is justified though.

UV ink! Pretty cool…






And yet another black light tattoo…

If I get a tattoo, this will be my first one…

Or maybe this one:

Girls, you can get one as well:

Nothing really over the top about this tattoo, I just thought it looked cool…

Same with this one (and I like the dog in the picture)…

This one isn’t too bad either (I’m not saying that I would get it, just that I can appreciate it)…

I like the texture created in this tattoo:

And I’m not normally a fan of flower tattoos, but…



As if one didn’t already have enough good reasons to join the Yakuza…



Metal implants. Not a tattoo, but still a little over the top…

OK, and I know this is paint, but how awesome (in an over the top way) would this be if it were a tattoo?

Not a wild tattoo, but a creative use of the space…

Another creative use of space:

With some additional experimentation, and individuals willing to serve as the canvas for that experimentation, I think 3D tattoos could be a very interesting segment for future growth in the tattoo field – as these pioneering examples demonstrate:


Who would get this for a tattoo? Further validation of my bias against the South…

Fictional tattoos, but tattoos that I felt were cool enough to merit inclusion:


Pretty decent ink job. Must’ve hurt to get it all along his ribs like that…

I would imagine the same holds true for this one:

I thought these tattoos looked pretty cool as well…








I’m not sure if I like it or not, but it is unique…

Not a bad one for Halloween:

Any Spiderman fans in the audience?

Or Wolverine Fans?

There have to be some Goonies fans…

OK, I’ll try to end this on a somewhat positive note:

[prezzy]

I don’t think any of us had a perfect childhood, but… Really?




Why we don’t let our friends give us tattoos:


Did this guy just give Papa Smurf a blowjob? Makes sense actually if you consider the male to female ratio in the Smurf community.

This tongue tattoo below is a bit better. You know, if you think about how much it hurts when you accidentally bite your tongue, think of how much getting a tongue tattoo must hurt…

And this one looks even better, but is probably Photoshopped.

A good anatomy lesson. This tattoo educates and entertains:

Here’s something else you could do with your arms:

Does this mean she is a moron and has nothing to say?

I never thought of turning the sketches I made in my notebook when I was bored in class into a tattoo, but this guy apparently did:

Well, it’s creative…

Can you imagine getting ready to have sex with a girl and suddenly encountering this if you were not expecting it? Neither can I.

I have to confess that I’ve never thought of having a chili dog tattooed on me.

Nor a bloody tampon with wings…

Maybe if her skin wasn’t rippling with cellulite and wasn’t blindingly white, I could muster an appreciation for this. But, under the present circumstances, I’m afraid not.

And this chick could be attractive, if she weren’t so covered in shit.

OK, so what happens when the vampire fad dies down a bit? People will think she has scabies or smallpox or worse.

Now, I thought this was pretty damn clever. These guys concealed their hair loss, by shaving their heads and tattooing hair in:


Not a shocking tattoo, but I thought it looked pretty cool.

Damn…

I know these aren’t tattoos, but fucking hell…



I’m struggling to understand the appeal of a series of tattoos that make it look like you got your ass kicked. So many people are willing to do the real thing for free.

Any cat lovers in the audience?

How very inviting.

Interesting.

Imagine, this is someone’s grandma…

God, and so is this!

I can see where he’s coming from. It always was the most fun to watch the girl fights in school.

I wonder how this guy would do in a job interview with this tattoo?

Probably better than this guy – one of the creepiest people I have ever seen.

So, the picture on the left is simply of this guy’s back, but if you look closely you will see that the tattoos on the right are on his eyelids and are not actually his eyes.

Rather subtle and clever.

Man, does anyone out there think this guy ever gets laid?

Just to remind you, dear readers, tattoos are permanent.

This made me think of My Little Pony differently.

The Japanese are funny, huh?

As always, I must give a nod of appreciation to the Yakuza though.

Awwwww, did someone not get enough attention from mummy and daddy?

It still amazes me that people voluntarily do this to themselves.

Unclassifiable.

Well, “Mr. Cool Ice” may have given us the world’s stupidest tattoos, but this may well be the world’s worst tattoo. Seriously, a retarded three-year-old could do a better job. And has anyone else noticed the correlation between waist size and bad tattoos?

Not that there is any shortage of stupid tattoos to reflect upon.

Seriously, what was this guy thinking?

Keepin’ it real with the black widows…

Well, after so much stupidity and/or negativity, I feel compelled to end on a positive note:

[prezzy]

Ummmmm. The world’s stupidest tattoos?


I wonder what this guy’s childhood was like?

Or this guy’s?

Girls, here’s a guy you can take home to meet the parents…

Or perhaps this guy?

How about “freak” as in, “These skin burning tattoos freak me out”

Whoa, that is classy. I’ll bet Michael Jackson would have appreciated that one… Actually, who am I kidding? I’d be pumped up if a girl tattooed me on her ass. Seriously pumped up…

How about fuck the “Systsem” that taught you to spell instead?

This is a man. No, really, it is!

Man, this guy is confident.

This one stood out to me not so much because of the tattoo, but because of the crazy contortions this chick went through to get this picture…

OK, this one did make me laugh. I wonder how it would go over in Pakistan or Iraq though?

A Van Gogh fan?

You are just begging to get into a bar fight with a tattoo like this…

That’s pretty direct, but you’ve got to respect a girl that knows what she wants.

Wow, this is even more direct. I’m sure her parents are proud of their little girl.

Maybe this is her sister? I’m sure her parents are proud of her too…

Speaking of bad tattoos, how about some of these:
Horrendous. It looks like he tried to cover up the flowery shit on his arm, but, of course, it just draws more attention to it.

Jesus Christ. It’s pretty hard to embarrass me, but I wouldn’t be seen with this guy.

See, even this guy’s friend is making fun of him.

I hope this is a joke, but I fear that it is not:

Zero self-esteem. And one horrible fucking tattoo.

Gives new meaning to the phrase “A hurricane triggered by a butterfly’s wings”…

I predict the owner of this tattoo grew up in a trailer park in rural Georgia and was a teenager when he had this done. Probably even thought it was cool at the time…

I sure hope this is a memorial tattoo for the girl in the picture and that she isn’t alive to see this.

This one isn’t necessarily bad in the way the tattoos above are bad, but I would think it is certainly a bad idea – especially if the gentleman pictured ever goes to prison where he would immediately become the most “popular” inmate…

Let’s get away from the mistakes for a minute… Check out these vintage tattoos:
Considering the standards and technology of the time, I think they are fairly decent.


And given the standards and technology of our time, I thought these were pretty decent:













I must have a thing for flora and fauna today, huh?
OK, so how about dragons instead? I thought these were good as well:





And, of course, no post about good tattoos would be complete without a nod to the Yakuza:

Well, all harmony must come to an end. So, check out some of these body modifications:
Oh, and, yes, I am aware that these are not tattoos, but who cares?

[flumperino]

omg, why would you get a tattoo on your ringpiece? Squeezing a tough one out can be bad enough, imagine having someone stab you with a needle there :O

[DJ OD]

Great posts and pics. Thanks


DJ OD

[MHP]

My old man had a swallow tattoo on his arm done in Germany when he was on national service in the early 50's. It's now virtually disappeared, you have to know it was there to see the shadow of what's left. My cousin had a tattoo of a dolphin on her shoulder done in the early 90's by a very good tattooist and is now a bluey green faded blob. Some of this ink looks pretty cool but if it fades and blurs in time then its gonna look like a train smash...

[Mobileman]

owwwwsa some of those must be bloody painful, some amazing tattoo skills though

[Mr.James]

Gotta say, I've never woken up before and thought "You know what, I'm gonna go and get my arsehole tattooed today"


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[Bald Bouncer]

Gotta say, I've never woken up before and thought "You know what, I'm gonna go and get my arsehole tattooed today"

No but I bet your wife has

[Mr.James]

No but I bet your wife has

Lol. No, I don't have any tats actually...


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[macmilm]

I'm bettin most of them are single Americans ????

Did like the the 'cunt puncher' though ;-)

[QfanatiQ]

Must pay attention to NSFW, who knew how bad a tattoo could be!

Q

[g_wizkid]

Some awesome stuff in there and some shocking stuff too.

Respect those who can stomach the pain, my tat was bad enough. Seems like a walk in the park compared to some of these though.


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[QfanatiQ]

After a slow look through now at home, I am most keen on the homage to the Goonies!

Q

[the.insane]

Is it wrong that half way through looking at those I was nursing a semi?