Hahahaha what a spanner. I cannot watch that program cos of the guys on it. Utter spanners. Showing you how to drill holes? Patronising bastard.
Hahahaha what a spanner. I cannot watch that program cos of the guys on it. Utter spanners. Showing you how to drill holes? Patronising bastard.
A mate of mine's brother was on one of them. Said as soon as the camera was off Nick Knowles wanted nowt to do with anyone not on the team - WGC by all accounts.
To most of us drilling a hole is a simple task and needs no explaining. But some haven't got a clue. When I worked as a senior engineer for Valeo there was a guy there who was super intelligent when it came to writing microprocessor code. As far as I remember he had a Phd. One day he needed a ground connection on a Jaguar bulkhead to connect his test equipment to. I gave him an electric drill with a 3mm drill bit and a suitable self tapper. He came back 15 minutes later saying that the screw was too small for the hole he had drilled. When I went to have a look the hole was about 6mm in diameter. Don't know what the fuck he had been doing. He must have been moving the drill around at an angle as if he was stirring thick porridge.
So not every one knows how to drill a simple hole even when given everything they need to do so. And being intelligent is not a guarantee of success either. (">
I call these people SPECIALISTs Bigbird.
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There are 3 types of people in the world - those who make things happen, those who watch things happen; and those who wondered what happened.
http://newsarse.com/
Conservatives. Putting the 'N' into Cuts.
BigBird (19th April 2014)
I do as little as possible.. work for Jaguar Land Rover in Liverpool... putting bits on the evoque.
Who were you when you thought you where you was?. Whats a matter for can't you want to?
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I work in the returns department for an av distributer. Getting pretty bored of it now. Money aint great but i live 2 mins walk away get to see my kids at lunchtime etc. Also get to play about with all the latest t v's. And home automation stuff. Really wish i got a trade though. I do have a good idea for a business and have been told it could be quite sucessfull but im to scared to quit my job and start it up. Im pretty skint and have kids so cant risk them going without
I am Health & Safety and HR Manager at a chemical works. I spend a lot of my time mitigating for stupidity and trying to make things idiot proof, only to find that while I was doing this, someone else came along and upgraded the idiots. My job is therefore an arms race, trying to stay one step ahead of them. I've discovered that common sense isn't very common any more and is practically a super power.
Before my current job, I did 25 years in the oils and lubricants industry, working in quality control, research and development, field tech support and field sales, pretty much a wardrobe full of T-shirts before I got made redundant after 8 1/2 years at Shell. I was gutted after grafting all that time, finally making it to the premiership at Shell before being given notice.
Last edited by WotTheFook; 23rd April 2014 at 09:09 PM.
Tested it so much that my body naturally produces it now when it comes to Handria & Palmela time.
In actual fact I am starting to bottle it up and it will soon be available to purchase in store at a sainsburys. At the last discussion they were talking about putting it next to the courgettes, although I have suggested that the butternut squashes would be a better point of sale.
We all make mistakes sometimes
No, I worked out of the Northern HQ at Wythenshawe and I covered the North, IOM and Ireland. Draw a line from Aberystwyth to Nottingham and I covered everything North of that line. There were big outsourcing changes afoot when I was made redundant in 2005, with the IT being sent out to India and the Customer Services to the Philippines. Shell just wanted to go back to drilling oil and gas out of the ground and in my opinion, they are ultimately as doomed as the dead critters they are drilling for with that strategy.
We do Shells IT as I understand these days.
Dunno mate. I work in FS and guys I know in Fuel aren't on Shell. Came close to doing some work for Seadrill but ended up on what I am doing now instead.
Heh, OK. "The Batcave" was the hardware area of the IT Department and you either had to be escorted at all times in there or have special high-security access. I only managed to get in there once to have my laptop repaired by them.
The only IT claim to fame (or notoriety) at Shell I have is this. When I worked in Sales, all prices had to be Schedule (List) Price minus a discount. We were all given an Excel spreadsheet and were asked to conform the pricing for all of our customers over a weekend and to mail it to the boss by Monday morning when the details would be uploaded to the main SAP system. I had an issue in that some of my customers paid more than Schedule Price due to low volumes, or SPOHC as it was known ('Spock' was a Small Pack Order Handling Charge). I struggled with this until I hit on the idea of "What if I apply a negative discount, so that it becomes a surcharge "Minus x minus = positive? Genius!" So I applied negative discounts where it was needed and sent it in.
My mobile rang at about 9.15am on the Monday and it was my boss. "Was there anything unusual about your pricing spreadheet?" came the question. "I don't think so," was my reply. "Well, the whole SAP pricing system has crashed and they having to roll the system back and your sheet was the last thing loaded before the crash."
Gulp. I knew I was for it as it was me that broke the system. "OK, so tell me what you did," the boss said, so I explained about how I had to apply negative discounts to apply surcharges, since the spreadsheet sent out to us only subtracted any numbers you put in. The line went silent for about 30 seconds then he said "You bloody chemists are too smart for your own good at times!" Well, it made sense in my head and mathematically, it was sound reasoning...
BertRoot (24th April 2014)
This is a project I have been managing for the past year or so.
http://heathrow.kulu.net/view/75lwSrf3rNj
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