Imaginary Friend for auction.
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Own 'Bernard', delivered by imagination. FFS!
Spoiler:Is life just a bit average? A bit mundane? Or perhaps your friends have let you down. Maybe you struggle to make friends, to meet new people, to put yourself out there - into that daunting social scene that is tainted with the threat of REJECTION. If this sounds like you, I have the solution: Bernard - my kind, loyal, charismatic Imaginary Friend that will NEVER leave you....unless you are ready.
REASON FOR SALE
I have recently come to the decision that it is time to sell my Imaginary friend Bernard who was created during a time of emotional instability. My psychiatrist recommended that I say goodbye to Bernard, and although I would like some financial compensation it is more important that he finds a good home.
I'm not sure of Bernard's age, as age is not measured in time where he is from. He embodies both childlike innocence and the wisdom of an elderly wizard. Physically, Bernard is in very good health. He is very active and has made me get out of bed to exercise on many a morning - very useful if you're looking to loose a few pounds.
Although Bernard is caring, generous and loyal he has be known to be quite mischievous! I was suspended from school after we decided to play a prank that involved several litres of dye and a swimming pool... Having said this, none of his pranks have ever been malicious. He just wants his best friend to smile - and that person could be you.
*This is not a book, although product is pure fiction.
**Bernard obviously will not be sent via post but will be sent via my imagination to the winning bidder's side.